have a snort

Anti-Piratism

I was thinking maybe Jerry Seinfeld could do some work for RIAA.

Mean it when you ring it

I just sayin. 

Cool License Plate #14

 

Greeting cards niche #4

Might not be Botox

 

Spry in retirement

No comment for fear of further excommunicating myself with society. 

Where do you start eating?

How yummy would six ears be? Six years of yummy! Wheeee!!! But then you'd have to break up the set. Would they be as happy? They couldn't be joined at the happy anymore.  

New Holiday #1

Or if you're not that ambitious, you could make it into a B. All I needed to know about faking report card grades I learned from my alarm clock LCD.

Make it snappy

Shoot, I got the words wrong.

When the light goes out

Cavities aren't just for kids anymore. Yo, I got Swiss teeth or somethin.

Not nice 2-point

Weight Watchers or Jenny Craig or somebody has points for their food. I wonder if their stuff is filling. If you really want filling, do the 7-Layer Super Nachos at the game.